


Invisible Becoming Visible

by mean_whale



Series: Blind Spot [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Best Friends, Bottom Iwaizumi Hajime, Crying, Drunken Confessions, Drunken Kissing, First Time, Friends to Lovers, Happy Ending, Love Confessions, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, Multiple Orgasms, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Roommates, Sleeping Together
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-25
Updated: 2016-10-25
Packaged: 2018-08-24 15:47:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8377999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mean_whale/pseuds/mean_whale
Summary: One night Oikawa gets drunk and confesses his feelings to his roommate Iwaizumi.





	

Iwaizumi Hajime had been working all evening, tiredly typing his research paper and trying to make sense of the long words that were starting to merge together the longer he stared at them. He rubbed his eyes and yawned, stretching his arms as he looked at the time. It was well past midnight.

With another stretch Iwaizumi turned off the computer and stood up. He should go to bed and continue in the morning. He pulled off his shirt on his way to the bathroom. Just as the shirt hit the hamper he heard a key scratching at the lock of the front door. He listened to the scratching go on and on, slightly amused by the fact that his roommate couldn’t seem to figure out how to open the door, but mostly annoyed at the fact that it meant that said roommate was incredibly drunk.

After a moment longer of listening to the clattering at the door Iwaizumi went to open it. He was met by Oikawa bent down and trying to shove his key into the keyhole. Oikawa’s face was flushed and he broke into a wide smile when he looked up at his childhood friend.

“Iwa-chan!” Oikawa slurred and tried to stand up straight but swayed forward. “The door is broken.”

Iwaizumi was looking at Oikawa with raised eyebrows and crossed arms.

“Iwa-chan, shh,” Oikawa couldn’t stop drops of spit from leaving his wet lips onto Iwaizumi’s chest, arm slowly rising up as he tried to press his index finger onto his friend’s lips. “I’m quiet! I won’t bother you at all!”

“Come in, you drunk,” Iwaizumi said instead of acknowledging Oikawa’s words and pulled the man inside.

Oikawa giggled and wobbled forward, trying to kick his shoes off but tumbling against Iwaizumi instead. Without a word Iwaizumi helped him get rid of the shoes before guiding him to sit down on the couch. Oikawa wrapped his arms around Iwaizumi’s frame, tiny giggles and sounds of content bubbling up from his throat. Oikawa pulled Iwaizumi down with him, a hand sliding over the man’s chest.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa whispered into his hair.

“I’m going to bed now, Shittykawa,” Iwaizumi said firmly and tried to get out of Oikawa’s hold.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa complained in his whiniest voice, “no fun!”

“I’m not trying to have fun,” Iwaizumi said.

He wasn’t sure why he was trying to reason with Oikawa. Maybe it was a way for him to ignore the fact that Oikawa’s body was warmly pressing against him, the soft scent of his hair enchanting him to a point where his heart started to beat heavier. Oikawa’s fingers were on his chest, his abdomen, his fingers brushing past a nipple, and Iwaizumi tried to keep his head clear.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa repeated, voice nearly a whimper.

Iwaizumi scoffed and tried to shake Oikawa’s arms off of him. Instead of being successful he felt his balance shift and suddenly Oikawa was straddling him, body pressing him onto the sofa.

“Stop being so stupid and let me go,” Iwaizumi commanded.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa whispered.

Iwaizumi opened his mouth to retort, but Oikawa took a hold of his face with sweaty palms, long fingers settling on his skin, and leaned towards him, eyes locked on his lips, a quick lick on his own lips before their mouths met.

Oikawa tasted like alcohol, Oikawa smelled like alcohol, and Iwaizumi knew he should push him away, but Oikawa’s lips were soft and slick, moving carefully. It was clumsy and Oikawa giggled, but Iwaizumi had never experienced a better kiss. He responded eagerly, allowing Oikawa to slip his tongue into his mouth, licks and sucks mingling as Oikawa moaned softly.

Awkwardly Oikawa leaned closer, climbing partly on top of Iwaizumi’s legs, and Iwaizumi pulled him down with him, hands in Oikawa’s soft hair. He had imagined their first kiss numerous times, thought about the way Oikawa would feel against him when he touched himself, but none of his imagined scenarios came even close to reality. Oikawa pressed his hips down, rolled them against Iwaizumi’s thigh, and Iwaizumi made a strangled sound, and that’s what startled him enough to revert him back to reality.

“Oikawa,” Iwaizumi tried and pulled back, Oikawa’s lips insistently following and kissing over his mouth. “Oikawa, stop.”

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa murmured happily, but Iwaizumi got a hold of his shoulders and pushed him away.

Oikawa’s mouth was open and he was breathing heavily, the smell of alcohol landing over Iwaizumi’s face.

“Stop,” Iwaizumi repeated.

Oikawa’s face distorted with sadness and he pressed his head on Iwaizumi’s chest.

“I ruined everything,” Oikawa sobbed. “Iwa-chan will leave me forever.”

Iwaizumi was breathing hard. A part of him really wanted to leave Oikawa to wallow in his misery, but a bigger part of him needed to make the tears stop. As infuriating as Oikawa had always been, Iwaizumi was madly in love with him, and even if it would make him lose sleep he was going to make sure that Oikawa stopped crying.

“I’m not going to leave you,” Iwaizumi said.

Oikawa immediately looked up at him, eyes brimming with tears as his lips trembled.

“You hate me,” Oikawa sniffled as tears dropped onto his cheeks. “You think I’m disgusting.”

Iwaizumi sighed.

“I don’t hate you,” he said, still trying to calm down.

Oikawa sobbed.

“Then why do you always run away from me?” he asked and hiccupped, more tears making their way down his cheeks.

“I don’t understand what you mean,” Iwaizumi said truthfully.

He couldn’t stop his hand from lifting up. As his fingers touched Oikawa’s cheek he felt his face heat up, Oikawa’s wet eyes staring at him surprisingly intently considering how drunk he was. Iwaizumi was sure that Oikawa wouldn’t remember anything in the morning. He carefully settled his hand on Oikawa’s cheek and wiped away the drop that was just making its way down. Oikawa slightly nuzzled against the touch, eyes downcast and lashes heavy with tears. He was so incredibly beautiful that Iwaizumi had to look away to fight the urge to kiss him again.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa mumbled.

Iwaizumi lowered his hand and raised his other to wipe on Oikawa’s other cheek.

“I love you so much,” Oikawa said and choked. “I love you, Iwa-chan! Why can’t you love me back?”

“You know you’re important to me,” Iwaizumi said quietly, his heart quenching.

“No!” Oikawa screamed and turned to stare at his friend. “You don’t care what I do. Or who I do. Because you don’t want me.”

Iwaizumi’s face was heating up again. He took a deep breath and tried to remind himself that Oikawa was drunk and didn’t know what he was saying. He pushed himself up from the sofa.

“You don’t know what you’re saying,” Iwaizumi said.

He felt violated. This must have been a stupid joke. Matsukawa or Hanamaki had most likely dared Oikawa to mess with him – they were the only ones who knew about his feelings for his best friend, and they were the friends who Oikawa had been out with.

“That’s enough,” Iwaizumi said as calmly as he could.

Oikawa lifted his head. His cheekbones were slightly glistening with tears and there was snot running from his nose. His hair was ruffled as a result of Iwaizumi’s finger having combed over it, and he looked like a real mess.

“I don’t know why you think this is funny, but it isn’t,” Iwaizumi said, trying to cling to calmness but feeling his surface break with each word.

Oikawa sniffed.

“Who told you about my feelings?” Iwaizumi asked. “I can’t believe you’re still childish enough to play with someone like this.”

Oikawa looked dumbfounded, and it didn’t surprise Iwaizumi. He would most likely pass out soon, and in the morning everything would be back to normal.

“What?” Oikawa asked slowly. “Iwa-chan. What do you mean?”

Iwaizumi sighed.

“I mean it’s not very mature to turn my feelings into a joke,” Iwaizumi said.

Oikawa stayed quiet and Iwaizumi turned around to leave. He had put up with this for long enough. The first thing in the morning he would start searching for another apartment, another roommate. Move away from Oikawa’s horrible jokes. Move away from the misery of seeing the love of your life every day and pretending.

“You don’t have any feelings,” Oikawa said.

Iwaizumi was surprised to hear his voice turn cold. He turned around to look at the drunk man who was now struggling to get up from the couch.

“If you had feelings,” Oikawa said and pointed a shaky finger at Iwaizumi, “you would know how much I love you and need you.”

Oikawa stumbled forward before catching his balance.

“I’m not stupid enough to think that you’re serious,” Iwaizumi said, trying to make his voice stern and not tremble. “You’re always just joking around, and I’ve had enough.”

“No, I’ve had enough!” Oikawa yelled. “Look at me, Iwa-chan!”

Oikawa took a huge step forward and grabbed a hold of Iwaizumi’s shoulders, trying to shake the man but only managing to upset his own balance.

“When will you look at me?” Oikawa said, voice desperate and fresh tears rising to his eyes. “Why won’t you look at me?”

Iwaizumi didn’t say anything. He was biting his lip, looking at the way Oikawa was swaying in front of him. Oikawa dragged his hands down to Iwaizumi’s chest.

“I just want to touch you, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa said quietly. “Here.”

Oikawa moved both his hands to Iwaizumi’s heart. His eyes were locked onto his hands, head swinging gently.

“I want to take you to my bed and make love to you,” Oikawa continued, words blurring together slightly. “I want to wake up next to you and I want to go to sleep next to you.”

Oikawa’s legs were shivering and he was leaning heavily onto Iwaizumi. He tried to speak but all that came out was a high-pitched whine before he fell onto his knees, hands dragging down onto Iwaizumi’s crotch.

“Oh, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa said with a blissful smile as he leaned forward and buried his face onto Iwaizumi’s groin.

Iwaizumi yelped and tried to jump back, but Oikawa wrapped his arms around his hips and mouthed at his cock through his sweatpants. Arousal sparked all over Iwaizumi’s body, and he had to fight himself to take a hold of Oikawa’s head to turn it away from him.

“No,” Iwaizumi said, although he knew that his face was saying something completely different.

Oikawa looked disappointed and slumped. He lay down onto the floor and sniffled.

The common sense in Iwaizumi told him to leave now, but he didn’t want to listen. A part of him had gotten hopeful, and as much as he tried to fight it away, he couldn’t. So he gently poked Oikawa with his toe.

“Get up,” he said, trying to sound caring instead of nervous or frustrated. “You’ll catch a cold if you pass out on the floor.”

“You don’t care,” Oikawa mumbled and curled into himself.

Iwaizumi sighed and crouched down. He poked at Oikawa’s shoulder, only driving the other man to curl more tightly. He sighed again and sat down.

“Look,” he started slowly, hoping that Oikawa was still listening. “I’ve been in love with you for years now.”

Oikawa jerked a bit but didn’t uncurl from his position.

“You keep flirting with everyone,” Iwaizumi continued carefully. “You turn everything into a joke. Of course I’m thinking that this is just another joke.”

Oikawa whined and shivered. Iwaizumi stroked his hand down Oikawa’s arm before standing up again.

“If you really loved me,” he said, not looking at Oikawa any longer, “wouldn’t you have made sure to act more serious about it? Why the hell would you get wasted and then tell me?”

Oikawa shifted, but Iwaizumi turned to face away.

“Obviously I won’t believe you,” he concluded.

He heard Oikawa whimper and move, but couldn’t bear to look. Instead he walked away, into his bedroom to change. He pulled his pants off. His heart was beating fast, a bitter taste in his mouth, and he didn’t know what to think about Oikawa’s drunken confession. He heard staggering from the hall and opened his door to check. Oikawa was slowly making his way forward, leaning onto the wall for support.

“Then,” Oikawa started before stopping to take a deep breath and licking his lips. “Will you believe me if I tell you when I’m sober?”

Iwaizumi frowned. Oikawa was staring at him, eyes starting to get slightly unfocused.

“You never believed me before,” Oikawa continued, his words getting more awkward and heavy. “What will make you believe me this time?”

Oikawa fell forward and Iwaizumi jumped to catch him before he could fall. Oikawa threw his arms over Iwaizumi’s shoulders.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa cried pitiably. “I’m so lonely without you.”

Iwaizumi huffed in some kind of response and tried to steer Oikawa towards his room.

“Iwa-chan, please,” Oikawa said. “Don’t leave me alone.”

“Damn it, Crappykawa,” Iwaizumi swore.

He was still trying to get Oikawa to turn towards his own room, but the man was apparently determined to not let go. He was leaning heavily on Iwaizumi, consciousness starting to slip away but stubbornness not fading. After some manoeuvring Iwaizumi gave up and dragged Oikawa to his bedroom. Oikawa made a happy sound and with a sudden surge of strength pushed Iwaizumi down onto the bed, his own heavy body following and settling on top.

“Get off!” Iwaizumi tried, but Oikawa simply nuzzled his face to the crook of Iwaizumi’s neck and took a deep breath.

“I want to blow you,” Oikawa mumbled.

Iwaizumi’s cheeks heated up and to his utter humiliation he could feel how his lower stomach stirred with interest.

“You can’t, you dumbass,” he said, voice soft as he looked at Oikawa’s half-hidden face. “You’re already passed out.”

Oikawa was breathing heavily against Iwaizumi, and Iwaizumi couldn’t bring himself to push the sleeping man away. Instead he reached to get a hold of the blanket and pulled it over the two of them.

*

A stir from Oikawa woke him up. He didn’t want to be awake yet. His sleep hadn’t been very deep, and as a result of that he felt like he hadn’t slept much at all. His brain had been repeating Oikawa’s words over and over again, supplying him with explicit memories of Oikawa’s lips pressed against his own, tongues touching, Oikawa mouthing at his cock.

Oikawa hummed and pressed his face closer to Iwaizumi’s neck, soft hair tickling his cheek. Iwaizumi frowned and wrapped his arm around Oikawa, hoping that his palm on the other man’s back would calm him down again.

“Huh?” Oikawa mumbled and raised his head instead of calming down.

He seemed to take a moment to clarify his whereabouts. Iwaizumi didn’t care. He wanted to sleep.

“Iwa-chan?” Oikawa suddenly gasped trying to jump away but kept there by Iwaizumi’s arm.

“Shut up,” Iwaizumi grumbled and turned around to hug Oikawa.

Oikawa stayed quiet for a moment, but to his irritation Iwaizumi could practically hear Oikawa’s thoughts turning around in his head.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa repeated weakly. “Why am I in your bed?”

Iwaizumi merely frowned and sighed before opening his eyes and facing Oikawa’s baffled face.

“Go back to sleep,” he commanded.

“Why are you naked?” Oikawa asked instead of doing what he was told.

“I’m not naked,” Iwaizumi shot back. “Now sleep.”

Oikawa went quiet and still. Iwaizumi shifted slightly but didn’t let go of Oikawa. His eyes were getting heavier again, forehead leaning against Oikawa’s chin.

He must have drifted off for a moment because the next thing he knew he was woken up by Oikawa groaning.

“Why can’t you keep quiet?” Iwaizumi asked sleepily.

“My head hurts,” Oikawa said quietly.

“No wonder,” Iwaizumi mumbled back. “You were so drunk last night.”

Oikawa squeaked and stiffened slightly.

“Iwa-chan,” he whispered. “What happened last night?”

“Nothing,” Iwaizumi replied.

As much as he would have liked to sleep for a moment longer, it was becoming obvious that Oikawa would not let him sleep. It was a miracle that the man was even awake so early.

Iwaizumi lifted his head up to look at the time. It was slightly past one in the afternoon. So maybe it wasn’t such a miracle that Oikawa was feeling well enough to be awake.

With a dissatisfied groan Iwaizumi let go of Oikawa and turned to lie on his back, blinking his eyes and stretching his body before sitting up and ruffling his hair.

“You want breakfast?” he asked Oikawa.

Oikawa peeked at him from where he was lying.

“Iwa-chan,” he said. “What did I do last night?”

“Lots of stupid things,” Iwaizumi said and stood up with a yawn. “Come to the kitchen when you’re ready to eat.”

With that he left the room and headed to the kitchen. He put the coffee on before a trip to the bathroom.

When Oikawa finally showed up in the kitchen Iwaizumi was already eating. He pointed towards the awaiting food and watched Oikawa get some. Oikawa was pale and had dark circles under his eyes. Iwaizumi finished his breakfast and went back to his room to get dressed. He didn’t want Oikawa to see how nervous he was, and how much his heart was pounding with the thought that maybe Oikawa hadn’t been full of shit. But now that Oikawa couldn’t remember anything about last night, what good was it?

Iwaizumi sat down next to the computer and opened the essay he had been writing. He couldn’t really focus, continuously listening to any sounds that Oikawa’s presence made.

Eventually Oikawa made it to the living room, quietly sitting down onto the sofa. There was electricity in the air and it had Iwaizumi’s hair stand up.

“Feeling any better?” Iwaizumi asked, hoping to ease the tension.

“Yeah,” Oikawa said quietly.

The tension didn’t disappear. Iwaizumi continued to stare at the computer screen, absolutely certain that Oikawa’s eyes were focused on the back of his head.

Sure enough, Oikawa soon broke the silence.

“Iwa-chan,” he said with a soft voice. “What did I do last night?”

The vulnerability in Oikawa’s voice made Iwaizumi turn around and face his friend. Oikawa was still pale and his shoulders were hunched. He looked small sitting on the couch, and Oikawa never looked small. Iwaizumi crinkled his brow before catching himself in the act and forcing his forehead smooth again.

“Please, tell me,” Oikawa pleaded when Iwaizumi stayed quiet.

Iwaizumi looked to the window before turning back to Oikawa.

“You tried to suck my dick,” he said, trying to keep a straight face.

Oikawa’s eyes widened and his face blushed. He covered his face with his hands.

“Oh my god,” Oikawa gasped.

Iwaizumi felt his own face heating up. Oikawa lifted his legs up to hide behind them.

“You told me I have no feelings whatsoever,” Iwaizumi continued.

Oikawa whined like he was wounded. Iwaizumi wasn’t sure what to say next. He wasn’t sure where he was going with this, where he wanted to go with it. His ears were warm.

“You said you want to make love to me,” he finally said, unable to hide the tremble in his voice. “And that you’re lonely without me.”

Oikawa hung his head lower, groaning quietly.

“And you kissed me,” Iwaizumi said quietly.

Oikawa gasped and looked up, eyes round and face burning red.

“No,” he whined and slowly shook his head.

Iwaizumi looked away.

“You told me you’re in love with me,” Iwaizumi continued, something crawling in his stomach and making him feel faint.

Oikawa wasn’t moving.

“And you said that you’d prove it to me when you’re sober,” Iwaizumi added.

They stay still for a moment, the room completely quiet. Iwaizumi couldn’t bring himself to look at Oikawa. Clearly the man was horrified by his actions, clearly he had done something that he didn’t really mean to do. Iwaizumi slowly turned around to face the computer again.

“Don’t worry about it,” he said and tried to laugh while sounding convincing. “I know how drunk you were. I know you didn’t mean anything.”

Oikawa shifted but didn’t say a thing. Iwaizumi focused on the letters on his essay, trying to read them, but they refused to form words. He was hyperaware of the other man in the room, heart hanging heavy in his chest and head spinning.

Oikawa quietly cleared his throat.

“Iwa-chan,” he started carefully.

Iwaizumi closed his eyes but didn’t turn around.

“What if,” Oikawa continued, voice timid and tight. “What if it meant something?”

The words felt like a stab in Iwaizumi’s heart and he couldn’t hide the shudder that shook him. Was this Oikawa’s way of manipulating a confession out of him? Surely he couldn’t be serious.

Silence stretched on, and Iwaizumi could hear Oikawa getting fidgety, on the verge of taking back his words.

“Then,” Iwaizumi began, voice dry and too loud in the quiet of the room. “Then I’d probably have to repeat what I told you last night.”

He could hear Oikawa breathing, he could hear the beating of his own heart and how his blood was rushing through his veins. He could hear every minor shift in Oikawa’s position, and he wanted to stop hearing the way Oikawa’s throat made a wet sound right before he spoke.

“What did you tell me last night?” Oikawa asked.

This silence stretched on even longer. Iwaizumi was staring at the keyboard, his entire body thumping with his heart, and he heard how Oikawa was leaned forward. The fragility of the moment was intimidating, and Iwaizumi was scared of breaking it. He had never been so afraid before.

“I told you,” he started, voice coming out so strained and dry that he had to clear his throat before repeating the words.

Iwaizumi glanced at Oikawa from his peripheral vision. He could see how the man was sitting on the very edge of the sofa, leaned so forward that the tiniest movement would make him tumble to the floor.

“I told you,” Iwaizumi said for the third time before continuing, “that I’ve been in love with you for years.”

Absolute silence followed his confession. It couldn’t have been more than a couple of seconds long, but it felt like forever. Iwaizumi had drops of sweat accumulating to his nape as his heart was racing.

The silence was broken by a faint gasp from Oikawa before he stood up so quickly that he immediately collapsed back down. Iwaizumi quickly turned to see what had happened.

Oikawa’s hands were on his cheeks, his face shining red.

“Oh,” Oikawa said, eyes wide and focused on Iwaizumi.

Iwaizumi was frozen, sitting on his chair with his legs tense as if he was about to jump up. He had his eyes on Oikawa but couldn’t quite meet his gaze. That’s why he missed Oikawa’s eyes filling with tears. When Oikawa sniffled, Iwaizumi finally looked at him properly, only to be startled by the fact that Oikawa was crying.

“Why are you crying?” Iwaizumi asked.

His heart felt like numerous needles were poking it at once, digging in slowly to cause the most pain possible.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa said before breaking down, sobbing almost hysterically as he stood up and staggered towards Iwaizumi.

Iwaizumi stood up to meet Oikawa who threw himself at him, arms spread wide to then wrap around Iwaizumi’s frame. He hugged Oikawa back without thinking, allowing the taller man to rest his head on his shoulder.

Oikawa mumbled something, but Iwaizumi could only make out his own name.

“What?” he asked. “I can’t hear you.”

Oikawa lifted his head up and came face to face with Iwaizumi, their tips of their noses brushing together momentarily as Oikawa blinked his eyes, heavy lashes shadowing his gaze.

“I love you too, Iwa-chan,” Oikawa said.

Iwaizumi immediately tried to pull back, head bubbling with thoughts like “this is a joke”, but Oikawa pressed their lips together.

It tasted like tears, and Oikawa’s hands came to rest on Iwaizumi’s cheeks, palms as soft as the night before, and Iwaizumi melted. He pulled Oikawa closer from the waist, their bodies bumping together as Oikawa breathed heavily through his nose. Iwaizumi’s hands were mapping Oikawa’s back, touching each shift of the muscles, memorising the way his shirt was obscuring the shape of him. Oikawa’s tongue was slippery and quick as it worked its way around Iwaizumi’s mouth, and Oikawa answered to Iwaizumi’s quiet moan with a pleased noise of his own, fingers pressing into Iwaizumi’s hair and massaging his nape in ways that made him shudder.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa gasped as he broke the kiss and bent his neck to kiss over Iwaizumi’s neck.

Iwaizumi slid his hands down to Oikawa’s hips before turning his head and pressing his own lips onto Oikawa’s neck, disentangling Oikawa’s fingers and lips from him to hungrily mouth at the smooth flesh he had always admired, had always wanted to taste. He gently sucked a trail from Oikawa’s ear to the underside of his chin, receiving a trembling whimper from Oikawa as he reached a certain spot on his neck and returning to that spot with licks and soft bites.

Oikawa’s arms were thrown over his shoulders, body shuddering in waves as the pressed their bodies together, and as Iwaizumi’s hands moved to Oikawa’s ass Oikawa lifted a hand into Iwaizumi’s hair, fingers massaging his scalp before settling. There was a sense of urgency in how Iwaizumi kissed Oikawa, how his hands touched the round ass that he had spent hours fantasising about, how his fingers couldn’t help digging just a tiny bit deeper each time, finding their way along the crack to between Oikawa’s thighs. Oikawa moaned, loud and clear, mouth right next to Iwaizumi’s ear, and his hips pressed closer, harder against Iwaizumi. Iwaizumi grunted against Oikawa’s neck when he felt how hard the man was, how his erection was pressing against his hip.

Iwaizumi wanted to lift Oikawa into his arms, tear off his clothes and fuck him against the wall. He wanted to have Oikawa everywhere around him, in him, so close to him that they could never be taken apart again, and his heart squeezed in his chest, making him lose his breath momentarily.

In this moment of weakness Oikawa gently steered him away from the living room and into his bedroom. The room was all Oikawa, it was his personality and scent and Iwaizumi could count the times he had been there with the fingers of one hand. He had always been afraid of going in, scared of losing his carefully crafted façade if he ventured too close, and now it was all taking his breath away.

Oikawa pushed Iwaizumi onto his bed, the one where Oikawa had had other people stay at times while Iwaizumi tried his best to not think about it. Now it was him, he was leaning back on the bed that smelled like Oikawa and Oikawa was undressing him, pulling off his sweatpants and he hurried to remove his shirt. Oikawa undressed himself too, not stopping before he was standing fully naked in front of Iwaizumi, positioned between his legs but not close enough. Iwaizumi struggled to pull his own underwear off as quickly as possible, nearly toppling off the bed in the process but gaining his balance.

There was no time wasted as Oikawa pushed Iwaizumi better onto the bed before climbing in himself, straddling Iwaizumi’s hips and bending down to kiss him with an open mouth. Iwaizumi’s heart was beating so fast that it was hard to focus on anything else than his shaky hands, and Oikawa kissed him so naturally. He could feel how the tips of their erections softly brushed together, and the short touch electrified his entire body. Oikawa’s hands were stroking his shoulders, and his skin burned under the touch.

Oikawa broke the kiss, sitting up and looking down to Iwaizumi. His lips were swollen red, the remains of tears still on his cheeks, and the way his face was shining made Iwaizumi’s heart flip. Oikawa rolled his hips closer to Iwaizumi’s, pushing his cock against Iwaizumi’s erection. Iwaizumi had to close his eyes to stop himself from coming at that very moment, when he felt Oikawa’s hard flesh against his own throbbing need, the way Oikawa’s pre-come mixed with his own on his skin. He found a hold of the sheets, back curving up and a broken moan following another roll of Oikawa’s hips.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa said, voice soft and loving, and Iwaizumi couldn’t bear to face him.

Oikawa brushed their lips together before lifting himself off. Iwaizumi’s entire body was tense, he was ready to snap, and he couldn’t bring himself to open his eyes. He was so scared of finding out that Oikawa had left him there because this was, after all, just a cruel joke, that he felt tears making their way up, only held back by his closed eyelids. His heart was beating in his throat, a jolt going through his body when Oikawa’s hands were on his legs, spreading them apart to allow room for him to settle between them.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa said, and there were soft fingers brushing over his closed eyes. “Aren’t you going to look?”

Iwaizumi determinedly shook his head. He didn’t want to risk losing the restraint he had of his pleasure right now, couldn’t risk breaking the moment in some way or another. Oikawa chuckled quietly, hands caressing the thighs on both sides of his hips.

“Feel free to look whenever you like,” Oikawa said.

His voice was honey pouring over Iwaizumi, and it heightened the sensation of utter bliss when a finger stroked over Iwaizumi’s entrance. Iwaizumi whined, cheeks turning red, and he spread his legs more. He heard the click of a cap, heard how Oikawa rubbed the lube over his fingers to warm it up before lowering his hand back to Iwaizumi’s backside.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa whispered.

He spread lube over the pucker, fingers gentle and careful.

“Have you ever done this before?” he asked.

Iwaizumi’s head was swimming with arousal, and it took him a moment to understand that Oikawa was asking him a question. His body was shivering, ass twitching with the anticipation of what was to come, and he found it extremely difficult to form words.

“Yeah,” he finally breathed out, and immediately after that Oikawa’s finger was pushing inside.

Iwaizumi had played with his ass before, just like he said. He owned a small selection of anal toys to use when Oikawa wasn’t home. But the feeling of Oikawa’s finger pushing past the tight muscle, the knowledge that it was Oikawa and not a piece of plastic was foreign. It was hard to understand, that the feeling of something inside him was another person, that it was Oikawa.

He had to look, so Iwaizumi slowly opened his eyes to watch Oikawa slowly move his arm as his finger was sliding in and out. Oikawa noticed his stare and smiled brightly, so bright that Iwaizumi thought he would be blinded by it, so he closed his eyes again.

The feeling of a second finger opening him up made Iwaizumi arch his body, hips pressing closer to Oikawa as he groaned. Oikawa breathed out loudly as his fingers sunk in deeper, as Iwaizumi’s hole tightened and loosened around them. It had never felt so good to be spread open as it did now that Oikawa was scissoring his fingers, rubbing his fingertips over the soft walls of Iwaizumi. When he added a third finger Iwaizumi couldn’t keep himself still anymore, couldn’t stop his hips from rolling over and over again to feel more, to get everything he could possibly get. Oikawa giggled quietly, pressing his fingers as deep as they would go when Iwaizumi moaned.

“More,” Iwaizumi begged, a drop of drool leaving his lips and sliding to his cheek as he was trashing his head around.

“Are you sure?” Oikawa asked, voice suddenly fragile and soft.

Iwaizumi nodded and opened his eyes.

“Yes,” he said, eye meeting Oikawa’s gaze. “Please.”

Oikawa withdrew his fingers to fumble open a condom. As he was rolling it over his dripping cock Iwaizumi could tell how his hands were shaking. He sat up and took a hold of Oikawa’s hands.

“Iwa-chan?” Oikawa looked up.

Iwaizumi opened his mouth to tell him how much he loved him, but couldn’t find the right words. The feelings he had storming inside himself had been accumulating for years and years, and he didn’t know if it was even possible to put them into words. Instead he kissed Oikawa, soft and gentle, fingers brushing a strand of hair out of his face before settling back down and lifting his hips for easier access. Oikawa looked at him, lips slightly ajar and eyes wide, before smiling and settling his hands on Iwaizumi’s thighs.

“I see, Iwa-chan,” he said.

Iwaizumi watched Oikawa take a hold of his cock to guide it to his hole. The tip pressing against his entrance was almost too much, and Iwaizumi bit his lip to keep himself together for just a moment longer. His cock was throbbing heavily over his abdomen, dripping pre-come that was slipping into his navel, and while he felt the need to touch himself or have Oikawa touch him, he knew that even one fleeting touch would be too much. So he took a shuddering breath as Oikawa’s tip entered him, wider than the fingers and much more pleasurable. The stretch was perfect, exactly what he had been looking for with all the toys he had purchased, and here it was – Oikawa’s girth.

Carefully Oikawa pushed his hips closer, cock sinking into Iwaizumi’s tight hole, and Iwaizumi thought he might explode soon. He was breathing so hard he was getting a bit light-headed and had to force himself to calm down while being filled by the only person he had ever wanted.

When Oikawa’s hips met Iwaizumi’s, Iwaizumi could feel his balls resting against his ass, and Oikawa leaned down to kiss him. It was short, sweet, and Iwaizumi was tense, tightening around Oikawa as he tried to keep his orgasm at bay for just a while longer. His moan was urgent and needy, and Oikawa stroked his hair.

“I know, Iwa-chan,” he whispered and pressed his lips to Iwaizumi’s temple, his soothing motions not making it any easier for Iwaizumi.

“Oikawa,” Iwaizumi started before changing his mind. “No, Tooru.”

He felt the minute shift of Oikawa’s hips at the sound of his name from Iwaizumi’s lips.

“Yes, Hajime?” Oikawa asked, hands still in Iwaizumi’s hair.

Slowly Oikawa was starting to roll his hips, gentle movements that shattered the rest of Iwaizumi’s calm, lips wet and skin glowing pink, a peek of a tongue when he licked his lips.

“Fuck,” Iwaizumi grunted. “Tooru, it’s my first time.”

He’s certain that Oikawa didn’t mean to push back in with such force, the amazement evident on his face, and his cock hit Iwaizumi’s prostate dead on, making him spill between their bodies, his orgasm so powerful that it left his body shuddering and tight, chest pressing closer to Oikawa’s body as his back arched and ass tightened. His hips rode out the orgasm, eyes closed tight and Oikawa’s hands in his hair.

When he calmed down and opened his eyes Oikawa was looking at him with a different kind of adoration.

“What?” he asked.

If he wasn’t already red from everything else, he would have blushed from being so intensely watched.

“I didn’t think I’d get to be your first,” Oikawa said quietly. “I can’t believe how lucky I am.”

Iwaizumi was embarrassed. It was only natural to assume that a guy at his age would have had sex at least with one person, most likely even more, and for a while it had been a complex for him. But he looked into Oikawa’s eyes, how much love he could see in them, and he knew that Oikawa wasn’t laughing at him. Oikawa was genuinely happy, and Iwaizumi couldn’t help breaking the eye contact.

“Shouldn’t you take full advantage of it, then?” he asked with a chuckle.

Oikawa cried out and rested his head on Iwaizumi’s shoulder before moving his hips again, starting out slow but gaining more speed as Iwaizumi relaxed again. The way his hips were rolling into Iwaizumi was tantalising, Iwaizumi couldn’t stop looking at the way his ass was moving with each thrust, couldn’t stop thinking about the way Oikawa’s cock was inside him, Oikawa was inside him, and Oikawa wanted it. Oikawa wanted to fuck into him, drive his cock deeper and deeper as his own breaths were getting heavier, noisier, and his pace faltered when he came, quiet squeals pouring out of his mouth as he rested against Iwaizumi, hips swaying gently.

When Oikawa stopped, Iwaizumi was on the verge of crying. His cock wasn’t exactly hard, but his entire body felt sensitive, each push of Oikawa’s cock against his prostate having made his legs tremble more. Oikawa pushed himself up and looked at him, at the way his body was heaving with over-stimulation. Oikawa slipped out of him, eliciting a grunt and a shiver.

“Do you want to try for a second orgasm?” he asked.

Iwaizumi shook his head.

“I don’t think I can,” he said, voice strangled.

“Sure?” Oikawa asked and sat up.

Iwaizumi nodded, body shaking and legs jolting every now and again. Oikawa was still watching him while he took off the condom and threw it towards the bin. Iwaizumi heard it miss and splat onto the floor. Oikawa lay back down, right next to Iwaizumi and a hand trailing up to his chest.

“Are you really sure?” he asked again.

Iwaizumi shook his head.

“I don’t know,” he said.

Oikawa hummed in response, stroking his chest with a soft hand, stroking his fingers over a nipple. Iwaizumi jerked, and Oikawa continued playing with his nipple, fingers almost lazily running over it, rubbing it until it was sensitive. Oikawa shifted slightly, hand trailing down to Iwaizumi’s stomach before taking a hold of his cock.

Iwaizumi gasped loudly, turning around to take a hold of Oikawa, pulling his upper body closer to his own and face pressing to the crook of his neck as Oikawa continued working his cock. Iwaizumi’s entire body shuddered, each muscle tensing as he felt familiar warmth gather into his lower belly, and with a few more pulls of Oikawa’s hand he came, weak spurts of semen dripping down his shaft and onto his skin.

He was shaking, still holding onto Oikawa, and he heard how Oikawa wiped his hand onto the sheets before hugging him. Oikawa’s hand was on his back, a warm presence that calmed his racing heart.

When Iwaizumi’s breath had evened out he finally pulled his head away from Oikawa and looked at him.

“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa said with a lopsided smile. “Does this mean you will be my boyfriend?”

Iwaizumi wanted to say something to that, he wanted to furrow his brows and chastise Oikawa for thinking he would sleep with someone who he wasn’t intending to date, especially after so many years of yearning, but instead he burst to quiet tears that he tried to blink away.

“Yes,” he croaked out, trying to hide his face, but Oikawa’s hands were on his cheeks, just like before, his soft hands on his skins and fingertips brushing into his hair.

“I’m so happy,” Oikawa said, and his eyes were glistening with tears too.

“Dumbass,” Iwaizumi managed with a heavy voice.

Oikawa leaned closer and brushed their lips together.

“Iwa-chan makes me so happy,” he said and they shared another kiss, teary and wet, but the sweetest so far.

**Author's Note:**

> I was really ill while writing a big part of this and half asleep when I proofread it, so. There might be mistakes I'm missing. Also I'm sorry for ending in such a stupid way but I couldn't keep adding to it any longer!
> 
> In case you missed it, next month I will be doing NaNoWriMo, which means that I will be focusing on original fiction and willl (hopefully) not even think about writing fics. I don't know if I'll still finish something before November, but if not, I'll get back to fics in December.
> 
> I have [a dedicated writing blog](http://mean-whalewrites.tumblr.com) but also sometimes talk about writing [on twitter](http://twitter.com/mean_whale), but to follow me on twitter please be over 18!


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